Mitre (Chancery Lane)

Roger Thornhill (North by Northwest)

*Tucking the ladies into a dark secluded corner booth, Roger Thornhill approaches the bar. His approach is noted and tracked by Vandamm the barman.*

Vandamm the barman: “So,..Eve…” *starts pouring some drinks.*

“You mean Me, Roger? Roger Thornhill? I’m Roger Thornhill. That’s Eve.” *Points to Eve in the corner.*

Vandamm: “Yes. Roger I know. So Roger…”

“Yea?”

Vandamm: “The Usuals …?”

“Yea?”

“The Usuals …for you and your two ladies?”

“Yea”

“ So Roger…”

“Yea?”

“What is happening?”

“Um,….. nothing. What do you mean?”

“What is happening?”

“Ummmm”

“Tomorrow?”

“Oh… Tomorrow right… yes… it’s my last day at work,…I guess I won’t be drinking here any more.”

“This is sudden. Have you been told to leave? What a shock this is!”

“Er no. I have a new job”

“Oh, so you have not been told to go no?”

“Well no. I’ve got a new job. I haven’t been sacked”

*At this point Eve and Clara have started to laugh uncontrollably.*

*Vandamm comes around from behind the bar, taking care not to bump his slicked back head on the ceiling. He sits down on the stool next to Roger and the stool topples over.*

*All bar Vandamm start to laugh.*

Vandamm: *dusting himself down* “Well I wouldn’t be surprised. I have seen some things in my time. Secretaries carried out of their office by their Line Manager......... hmmmm?”

“Well I can assure you I haven’t been sacked. I’m actually moving to quite a good job”

“This is sudden!”

“Well no. I got the job three months ago. I’ve been working my notice. Have you not noticed that I have been here slightly more often recently? That I’ve been drinking more than usual? I’ve been winding down.”

“New Job? Winding down?! Where?”

“Where?”

“Where are you going to?”

“My new job is with The Nicholson’s… Public Relations Manager.”

“Nicholson’s huh! I expect the money’s bad.”

“Well, actually it’s a lot better than here.”

“Hahahahaha!! I don’t imagine so.”

“Well it is.”

“Who will I give my nuts to now?” *Vandamm has been known to walk around the pub distributing nuts to all and sundry – placing bowls on the tables.* “Will you have one now?”

“No.”

Vandamm *to the ladies*: “Clara? Roger will not take a nut.”

Thornhill: *picking up the drinks and stooping down in preparation to go over to the seats.* “You’ll have to give your nuts to somebody else in the future I’m afraid.”

Vandamm: “Oh,..and so where will you be having your drinks in the future? Where will you be doing the pints?”

I really do not know yet,..

I see!

Anyway, *walking back to the table with the drinks*… I’ll see you tomorrow then. For my last day. I will buy you a pint.”

Vandamm: *Arms folded, impassive, nodding* : “Yes, I shall see you tomorrow Mr Thornhill.”

Roger Thornhill’s rating for The Mitre – 9 / 10

Rolosocosy 

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