Chippenham (Maida Vale-ish)

Jack Bauer (24)

*Jack Bauer is crouched on the corner of Shirland Road and Kilburn Park Road with a gun in one hand and a walkie talkie in the other, talking to Tony Almeida at CTU*

JACK : “Tony, it’s Jack. I’m outside The Chippenham. I need you to track me when I enter the building. Can you pinpoint my exact location and key it in real time? Great. Now reconfigure the satellite on Harrow Road and switch to bandwidth frequency to phase out the interference. Then upload the recon to my PDA.

“I also need you to run a check on the owners. Years ago they hijacked and terrorised this bar. They brokered a deal and then took the bar hostage for cash. We need to take them alive for questioning to find out why they destroyed a perfectly good bar. But first we have to locate them. We can speed up access by downloading their grid to our uptown location and then uploading our grid to their downtown location. If that won’t work then we’ll have to do a point-by-point search. Got it? That’s good work, Tony.

“Thanks for pulling the background files. You may need to back-time the satellite feeds. I see they used to have 4 pool tables up there in the dormitory room but they stripped them all out about 8 years ago to make more money. Great. I’m told the old landlord Jerry was a drunk Irishman but at least he cared about his pool. Apparently he used to buy fried chicken for the pool team on a Thursday night. Once The Chippenham even hosted a £1000 winner-takes-all national event that attracted big name County players and local legends. This was a hot-bed of pool, Tony… but the new owners screwed it up. We know what they’re capable of and they need to be stopped. Where’s the nearest tag team?

TONY: “You’re the nearest tag team, Jack. And isn’t The Chippenham just an old bar? There’s no real threat to national security in there….

JACK: “Any public place that looks this bad and does as much to damage the local pool scene is an unacceptable threat to our civil liberties. And I think they have Kim and Audrey in there as well. No Tony - I don’t have time to explain it now… you’re going to have to trust me. I’ll debrief you later...

TONY: “Ok, Jack. I’ve scanned the data stream intel and recovered video feed images and voice patterns… there’s a positive match. We now have confirmation that the suspects are inside the building. I repeat… the suspects are inside the building. Your most direct route is through the front door.”

JACK: “Copy that. And send the files to audio forensics for further analysis. Meanwhile I’m getting a positive reading on the sign outside the door. It says they have dormitory beds upstairs from £10 a night. This is a real classy joint, Tony. I think they must be marketing themselves to Australian backpackers and winos. Set up a perimeter and mobilize your teams on my mark.

“Also I need Chloe to transfer the infra-red floor plan schematics to my sub-net and triangulate the co-ords on our target zone. Great. How many guards are there? Two by the fruit machine, and only one at the bar? Is that because nobody drinks at this dump any more? Copy that.

TONY: “Jack, I’ve run a full scale diagnostic on your personal files. I’m getting the same signature trace on all your experiences over the last six series. There’s so many similarities that it’s hard to know where to start but basically there’s more nukes and more people that need to be tortured… the President can’t sanction your actions, the Vice President is a hawk, there’s a decoy leak in CTU, the comms staff are all seeing each other and your lover from your old life has been killed. By the way… your new lover has a young boy from another marriage and he needs you right now. You can promise him a man-to-man later when all this is done. The only thing left to complete the formula is for you to inform the President of your decision to take everything on yourself and then to finally go rogue without telling either of your families.

I have the President holding for you on Line 1...”

JACK: “Patch him through.”

“Hello, Mr President…. Yes Sir, I understand. Rest assured Mr President that I will do whatever is necessary to get the information we require. Yes, I know you can’t be seen to condone the torture of suspects, Mr President. And that’s why I intend to take full responsibility for this. When I am done here I will grab my shoulder bag and walk off into the sunset. I will disappear from everyone’s lives forever. You have my personal word on that, Mr President. You will never ever see me again. Until CTU gives me a buzz on the mobile. All that remains is for me to say what an honour it has been to know you.”

THE PRESIDENT: “The honour is all mine, Jack. This country owes you its life.”

JACK *gritty*: “I’m going in …."

*Jacks enters the pub carrying a silver briefcase and approaches the barman*

JACK *laser-eyed*: “My God, I don’t want to hurt you. If you do as I ask then everything will be okay.” *Jack pulls out a “prepped” syringe, IV drip, straps and a block of wood for the victim to chew on*

HARMLESS BARMAN *hands up, passive, child-like*: “Please mate, I just work here and serve drinks… I swear I don’t know anything…”

JACK *robotic, falling back on his training*: “You’re lying, damn it. I can see it in your eyes. You leave me no choice. God forgive me.” *Jack tortures the barman into cardiac arrest with extreme prejudice, then breaks down*

TONY: “You did what you had to do, Jack. It wasn’t your fault. You can’t blame yourself…”

JACK *crying, with his head in his hands*: “I’m done. I can’t do this anymore…. At least not until Series 7. Until then, I have to go off the radar.

*As he is about to leave the building Jack notices the only pool table left in the pub and senses an opportunity…*

“This pool table doesn’t have any lights above it, Tony. Nothing. Not even a dangling bulb. People have to play pool in the shadows here. I can’t see my hand in front of my own face. A man could lose himself in a place like this. No one would ever find me next to this sorry excuse for a pool table, where it is literally pitch black for anyone who wants to play the game. Tony…. Pull the drapes…snuff out some candles for me… throw a blanket over my head. Whatever it takes. I’m going dark.”

Jack Bauer’s rating for The Chippenham - 0/10
*"I wouldn’t bother diffusing a bomb in this place.”*

Savage Cheyne

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