Red Cat Hotel (Kings Lynn)

Coal Sear (The Sixth Sense)

There’s nothing like a few sets of the ole “Arra’s” to keep a blokes mind off things, is there!

Double top, lager top,..216, with a potential 5 dart finish. Absolutely perfect,..and an unbelievable distraction from the day to day goings on. It's brilliant.

*Get us pint will ya Cole,…come on?*

"Ssssssh!,." Erm yeah, so,...yeah,..Over in The States you don’t see it so much; Darts that is. Over there it’s more of a “fringe” pastime, something that’s a little bit on the edge, you know, not mass market, however, you can’t get enough of it in England can ya?! You’re the real masters when it comes to pub games you lot. *I’ve been here 3 years now, and am yet to win a game of pool in this country!*

I like the fact that real English pubs still have dart boards, and I love the fact that there’s one here in my weekend local - The Red Cat Hotel. 

Having to focus on hand-eye coordination and sophisticated mathematical calculations are exactly what you need when you’re used to having a million different things pressing on your mind; with people asking you for stuff and vying for your attention at every turn. *I’d say that on an average day in London I deal with approximately 100 requests from these apparitions, and it’s more or less a full-time job.*

*Cole,..are you listening to me?! Just a pint, please mate..come on,..get em in!*

"Quiet Tony!" .........The dead can be so selfish.

Where was i? Yes,...so yeah, I’ll tell you what, when I first discovered Darts, it was a real eye opener and a serious no-brainer. You need extreme concentration; “focus” they said, oh, and attention to detail. “You have to close yourself off to all distractions” they told me; “right up my alley” I thought.

*Don’t distress me man,….Cole, you know I’m good for it. “T the T” is always good for it,…Just one Foster’s top please chum. It’s your turn by the way, John threw a 58, so you need double 17 to take it into a decider.*

"Shut up for a minute will you Tony! For godsake; I’m talking here!"

Like I was saying….So I’ve been living in London since I was 18 *I couldn’t wait until 21 to legally booze.* But, you see, you can’t move for the dead in that fair city. So every free weekend I get, I pop on up to Norfolk to relax and get away from it all. I walk the deserted fens in the daytime and play darts in my local, in the evening; what could be better? I just want a quiet life, and this suits me just right.

See, there are ghosts everywhere of course, but, when you’re in a deserted, flat, rural environment, you’ve little chance of being shocked by someone jumping out at ya from behind a hill or from around a street corner. When I walk the fields in North Wootton, there’s no chance of any of that. My doctor says that it does my blood pressure real favours. 

I'm in The Red Cat most Friday and Saturday nights. They (Peter, the staff and punters) make me feel most welcome and treat me like a regular in here. But the main reason I come here is that it’s a hassle free environment with a good selection of considerate ghosts, who just leave me alone and allow me to get on with my Darts and my drinking. The only one who’s mildly annoying is (the ghost of) Tony the Tiger,..who normally badgers me a little,..mostly for pints.

But, to tell you the truth, I don’t mind it so much, cos I like him, he’s a great cat really; a real good laugh. And also, he'll often help me win a game of Darts by pulling my opponents “arra’s” outa the board when they turn their backs. As a reward, I buy him the occasional pint and he’s invariably happily placated.

n.b. Don’t ask me how he drinks em (the pints) though!? It’s as much a mystery to me, as it should be to you. Suffice it to say, his glass is always empty by the end of the evening,…

*Cole,..how about that pint mate?! As you can see,..i’ve pulled John’s dart outa the 15,..and chucked it behind the radiator! You’ll romp this game now.*

"Alright Tony! Geez ok! But this is the last one tonight. Don’t be “Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreedy!!”

Cole Sear’s rating for The Red Cat – 9/10

Rolosocosy

Tony is giving Coal the night off, but will his resolve fail him?

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• Natural Selection,..

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