Browns Bar (Westminster)

Betty Boop (Who Framed Roger Rabbit)

Consider this. You're a washed-up 1920's cartoon character. Even back in the roaring 20s, when a glimpse of stocking was …..well …. ya know….something shocking …. you weren't sexy.

Fast forward to the eighties. You've been cast in a film as a washed-up 1920s cartoon character, a waitress in a fictional bar, run by - erm - cartoon characters.

It gets worse ... and even more surreal. Quarter of a century later, you're asked to review a bar, for a web site featuring fictional reviews of London boozers, written by fictional characters.

It's a mindfizz innit?

But it doesn't even end there, sugar. The bar I've been asked to review doesn't even exist – it's fictional too. How am I expected to square that circle (like those early cartoonists did to my ridiculously shaped swede)?

So…..what can I tell you about Brown's Bar at 10 Downing Street in Westminster?

Sweet Fanny Adams! It doesn't exist. What's the matter with you lot? Haven't you read a word of this? it's all cobblers.

Boo boo be doop.

Betty Boop's rating for Brown's Bar ….oh dear God!

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